The last 4 days i felt paralysed. Overwhelmed with fear. The sheer volume of bad news, mass panic and uncertainty from leaders what to do, all acting as a conductor for those old feelings of being out of control to surface.
And i don’t know if you have the same need of being in control of your life, but i surely have this feeling in abundance.
I suppose it is like the need for certainty. As much as i love spontaneity, spur of the moment decisions and having a wild existence, this only works with a good amount of certainty. And i have got bundles of certainty. A reliable husband, a great upbringing and relation with my parents, a good career giving me a steady income.
So where did my certainty go? I still have the above constants in my life. It is the picking up of the uncertainty of others that is feeding my fear.
When in your own home, watching a funny movie or watching your children play in the garden, really being in that moment do you feel the fear of the world? It somehow disappears, as if it is another dimension.
This is resilience. Being still in the moment. All that matters, right here, right now. Even if you do have so many uncertain factors, you have lost your job, you have lost a loved one, you have no friends. Know this is temporary.
Be still, in the moment, can you still laugh at a funny movie, do you smile seeing a child explore the world, can you lose yourself in singing out loud? They call it mindfulness but to me this shows resilience. We will not bow down to all the misery in the world, we can still smile and laugh and love.
Do something you love every day and enjoy. Loose yourself in the moment and forget the world. Tomorrow you can be there again for others but for now just be and let go of your fear.
